As a resident fine girl that didn’t grow up with a silver spoon, I think I have earned the right to speak on this topic without feeling like I’m speaking from a place of privilege because I’m not.
If you ever give into sex for favors, I’m sorry but it’s all on you.
No one ever does anything they do not imagine themselves doing.
If you think killing someone is justified if they did something horrible, there will come a time when that chance will present itself and you would do it. Simple. Whatever your mind doesn’t fully condemn or can justify (sort of), you are open to doing.
And that’s always the case for sex-for-favors.
I have heard people say it’s because you have a choice. No dear, if it’s a choice for you to lie down for someone to have sex with you to get something, then it’s a choice but if it isn’t, it will never be a choice.
Practical ways I have dealt with this misfortune all my life?
- In University, when I realized that a lecturer wasn’t going to let me be, I made sure that even if I didn’t read for any paper, I read for his so that if he failed me, I could call for my script. He couldn’t fail me, I was the best in my class so if I failed, the whole class must fail, it was obvious.
- As a salesperson, I had a rule, if I am left with no option than sex for a deal, I’m letting go. Oh! I lost a lot of deals and it was painful. And so because I wasn’t ready to continue to lose deals a lot nor was the sex-for deal an option, I developed ways around those men. I got into survival mode. I learned how to get what I wanted without giving them what they want. I think if I’m being honest, I learned diplomacy so much that I think I could easily manipulate any man to get what I want. Any 🤷♀️.
- Oh! Bosses???! They would all always hate to lose me. Everywhere I have worked, I was the “IT” staff. It’s going to be hard to lay me off when your bottom line needs me. And even if you do lay me off, I was ready to lose a job and they all knew. You would only threaten me with my job when you think I’m desperate to keep it. As much as I needed the job, I always made them know I could get another so easily. And that was my truth and belief so I wasn’t fazed.
In a nutshell, what I’m saying is, I try not to judge but I think for every sex-for-favor option, there is a harder or longer route that one could take but don’t want to take because they think the sex you’re offered is the easiest and faster option.
Don’t be desperate to keep or have anything, and don’t be lazy to put in the work and the sex-for-favor option will never appeal. Never!
While we could have spent our time bashing those who request sex, I will waste no time on them because adults know they are badly behaved and will continue as far as it serves them. I think we should spend more time telling each other to never give in to such requests.
My life motto has always been that: “I would starve or lose anything before a man would POUND me recklessly and wickedly for any damn favor”.
P.S: I do not judge you if you’ve done it, I just think you can make better decisions next time. You should give your body to whoever you want to give it to not be coerced.
Lastly, if sex-for-favors isn’t a big deal to you because you think you can trade your body to get whatever you want, by all means. It’s your body and your choice. This article is for those who don’t but think they are left with no choice.
You do have choices dear😇